Wednesday, December 28, 2011

Bottles of Bubbly

Image by Matt Banks via freedigitalphotos.net

As bottles and bottles of bubbly are being bought
to toast the new year and stock up local yachts,
I found myself curious about this sweet nectar
and decided to ask Google to be today's lector.
I already knew of the rule from the Treaty of Madrid,
but I learned a few things not known by most kids.

I (now) won't drink champagne from a short or wide glass.
It lets bubbles out faster and without them I'll pass.
I also now believe I could create a bottle-a-day-diet.
Only 9 grams of sugar! (Someone would try it.)
Did you know champagne can be used to entertain visually?
If you drop a raisin in, it will bounce... or so they tell me.

Madame Veuve Clicquot invented the riddling rack,
which pushed Champagne production into the fast track.
Many say Dom Perignon invented the French bubbly drink,
but that statement is not quite as true as they all think.
He was actually trying to prevent the bubbles from forming,
but fate wouldn't let them cease scrumptiously swarming.

Most of us couldn't fathom spending thirty-five grand
to buy the most expensive bottle found in the land.
We also couldn't afford to fill up the bathtub
with three-hundred-fifty bottles from the pub.
But each of us consumes millions of bubbles with one cheers,
that is, if you are drinking Champagne this New Years.

© 2011 - All Rights Reserved - Rachel Hoyt

wine.com infographic
Brought To By Wine.com, Purveyors of Fine Wine and Champagne

Tuesday, December 27, 2011

Comically Crunching

Caution: this video has a scary happy ending
that shows someone learning the hard way
that taunting appendages may need mending
after an owner causes his or her pet dismay.

© 2011 - All Rights Reserved - Rachel Hoyt





Josh from "Its Tiger Time" invented You Tube Tuesday so we could each share one video a week which we found to be fun, inspiring or otherwise noteworthy.  If you choose to participate, don't forget to leave your links in my comments section (so I can come visit you) and on Josh's page (so you can be part of the contest).  I hope you like this week's selection!
 

Thursday, December 22, 2011

Who-ville People Today


 Image by graur razvan ionut via freedigitalphotos.net 

Sometimes the best gift you can give or get yourself
has very, very little to do with spreading wealth.
The most joy at the holidays comes from time with family
and acts of random kindness that we may somehow see.

Why not cause a random act of kindness on your own?
There are things you could do while being lazy at home.
Play trivia at Free Rice to help feed mouths worldwide.
Or use SearchKindly.com for your next world-wide-web-ride.

If you have an unwanted fur coat in your room,
donate it to help comfort an orphaned raccoon.
Or if you have the skills to knit or crochet a sweater,
there are penguins and hens that need them to get better.

There are tons of easy ways to spread some holiday cheer
to those outside your circle of friends held near and dear.
I think that is how the Who-ville people would show today
that the holidays are about more than presents and a big light display.

© 2011 - All Rights Reserved - Rachel Hoyt

This rhyme was inspired by Mental Floss:

Wednesday, December 21, 2011

Catch Santa If You Can


image by digitalart via freedigitalphotos.net

You could catch mommy kissing Santa Claus,
Stopping to shake one of your dog's paws,
Sneaking a drink a bit stronger than milk,
Or cleaning up the drink he spilt.

"How can we do that if he's fake?" you say.
They can help you catch Santa at your house...
and it's easier than catching a sneaky mouse.

2011 - All Rights Reserved - Rachel Hoyt

Tuesday, December 20, 2011

You Tube Tuesday - Hedgehog Humbug






To make a cup of bah-humbug, here’s what you need:
an adorable idea and a gigantic pile of greed.
Take that cuteness and dangle it in front of the masses
then only give it out in teeny tiny splashes.

© 2011 - All Rights Reserved - Rachel Hoyt


I felt a little upset after trying to make hedgehogs sing
and feeling disappointed at the results it did bring.




Josh from "Its Tiger Time" invented You Tube Tuesday so we could each share one video a week which we found to be fun, inspiring or otherwise noteworthy.  If you choose to participate, don't forget to leave your links in my comments section (so I can come visit you) and on Josh's page (so you can be part of the contest).

Wednesday, December 14, 2011

Zoo Children Act Out

Image by digitalart via freedigitalphotos.net

Many say the Occupy movement is silly;
isn't saying anything; is organized willy nilly.
I tend to feel that every protest says a lot,
whether I'm into the cause of the day or not.

In my eyes the world is reacting as children do,
when parents behave how we're not supposed to.
Perhaps Congress should try it so we don't flip our lids.

Like a family caught in an endless seedy roundabout,
we kids fear we're forgotten, so we sit around and shout.
Our "parents" can't agree on what the rules should be.
They're the ones acting stupid and willy nilly.

The Elephants are jubilantly stomping their feet
on every mousy law that their smarty snouts meet.
The Donkeys are in danger of becoming real asses -
permissiveness wants (but always fails) to please the masses.

Perhaps Congress should have a group counseling session?
Maybe Dr's Phil or Laura could teach them a lesson?
We "kids" of the world pay these "parents" to guide us.
They should be acting in ways to properly inspire us.

© 2011 - All Rights Reserved - Rachel Hoyt


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Tuesday, December 13, 2011

Angry Birds Movie Limerick


 


This movie looks like one big commercial,
Yet I doubt it will be controversial.
With just enough action,
We'll find satisfaction
And feel, in its own way, it's special.

2011 - All Rights Reserved - Rachel Hoyt


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Josh from "Its Tiger Time" invented You Tube Tuesday so we could each share one video a week which we found to be fun, inspiring or otherwise noteworthy.  If you choose to participate, don't forget to leave your links in my comments section (so I can come visit you) and on Josh's page (so you can be part of the contest).

Saturday, December 10, 2011

The Grinch and Godzilla

Image by Simon Howden via freedigitalphotos.com

The Grinch has a friend named Godzilla.
He treats him like a pet Gorilla.
They make people frown
In malls around town
Then relax at the Grinch's villa.

© 2011 - All Rights Reserved - Rachel Hoyt

Friday, December 9, 2011

The Single Girl's 12 Years of Christmas

(Feel free to skip to the end if you aren't the type to sing along like me. 
Otherwise, get ready to sing a new version of the 12 Days of Christmas... gleefully.)

Ostrich photograph ©2011 - Rachel Hoyt
Holiday photo editing assistance provided by Lens Tripping Photography
Thank you, Jewell.  You rule!


On my first single Christmas,
I wished Santa’d bring to me
A magic money-growing tree.

On my second single Christmas,
I wished Santa’d bring to me
Two handymen,
And a magic money-growing tree.

On my third single Christmas,
I wished Santa’d bring to me
Three nice seamen,
Two handymen,
And a magic money-growing tree. 

On my fourth single Christmas,
I wished Santa’d bring to me
Four fine diners,
Three nice seamen,
Two handymen,
And a magic money-growing tree.

On my fifth single Christmas,
I wished Santa’d bring to me
Five gay designers,
Four fine diners,
Three nice seamen,
Two handymen,
And a magic money-growing tree.

On my sixth single Christmas,
I wished Santa’d bring to me
Six gamblers gambling,
Five gay designers,
Four fine diners,
Three nice seamen,
Two handymen,
And a magic money-growing tree.

On my seventh single Christmas,
I wished Santa’d bring to me
Seven jokesters rambling,
Six gamblers gambling,
Five gay designers,
Four fine diners,
Three nice seamen,
Two handymen,
And a magic money-growing tree.

On my eighth single Christmas,
I wished Santa’d bring to me
Eight posh vintners,
Seven jokesters rambling,
Six gamblers gambling,
Five gay designers,
Four fine diners,
Three nice seamen,
Two handymen,
And a magic money-growing tree.

On my ninth single Christmas,
I wished Santa’d bring to me
Nine soul sisters,
Eight posh vintners,
Seven jokesters rambling,
Six gamblers gambling,
Five gay designers,
Four fine diners,
Three nice seamen,
Two handymen,
And a magic money-growing tree.

On my tenth single Christmas,
I wished Santa’d bring to me
Ten pills for popping,
Nine soul sisters,
Eight posh vintners,
Seven jokesters rambling,
Six gamblers gambling,
Five gay designers,
Four fine diners,
Three nice seamen,
Two handymen,
And a magic money-growing tree.

On my eleventh single Christmas,
I wished Santa’d bring to me
Eleven gems for gawking,
Ten pills for popping,
Nine soul sisters,
Eight posh vintners,
Seven jokesters rambling,
Six gamblers gambling,
Five gay designers,
Four fine diners,
Three nice seamen,
Two handymen,
And a magic money-growing tree.

On my twelfth single Christmas,
I wished Santa’d bring to me
free plastic surgery,
Eleven gems for gawking,
Ten pills for popping,
Nine soul sisters,
Eight posh vintners,
Seven jokesters rambling,
Six gamblers gambling,
Five gay designers,
Four fine diners,
Three nice seamen,
Two handymen,
And a magic money-growing tree! 

© 2011 - All rights reserved - Rachel Hoyt



Thursday, December 8, 2011

Doors and Windows Ramble



Doors and windows; windows and doors;
More exciting to look at than ceilings and floors.

Doors and windows; windows and doors;
Both often make excellent metaphors.

Doors and windows; windows and doors;
Amazingly good at drowning out snores.

Doors and windows; windows and doors;
Places known to gather mold spores.

Doors and windows; windows and doors;
Symbols of our "keeping up with the Jones" scores. 

Doors and windows; windows and doors;
My studies taught me very little about yours.

© 2011 - All rights reserved. - Rachel Hoyt


This is my rhyming response to
Smiley Sociology Study #10.
It was inconclusive, so I made you
a silly random rhyme again.

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Monday, December 5, 2011

Rubber-Band Regret



These rhymes were written for Mad-Kane's Limerick Off.
Click to read more funny entries.  I promise you won't scoff.

VERSION #1:

A guy who was frequently prone
to gain cash that others had blown
rubber-bands, with a yawn.
"I'd invested if only I'd known."

© 2011 - All rights reserved - Rachel Hoyt

VERSION #2:
 
 
A guy who was frequently prone
to gain cash that others had blown
rubber-bands, with a yawn.
"Esto me hace un papelón?"

© 2011 - All rights reserved - Rachel Hoyt

(Non-Rhyming Side Note: I changed the final line because I have always wanted to rhyme in Spanish and this seemed a great time to try it.  The translation is, roughly, "This makes me foolish?" or "This makes a fool out of me?")

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Thursday, December 1, 2011

Smiley Sociology Study #11 - Gifts


Image by digitalart via freedigitalphotos.net

I find in December it's hard not to think about
gifts I loved and / or could have lived without,
items most likely to be re-gifted or returned,
and the silly things for which I once yearned.

So, I've made gifts the theme for this month's study
in hopes you have a story for me, your blog buddy.
Use the gift giving theme however you like...
perhaps share the memory of receiving your first bike?

You have the whole month to write something creative...
or perhaps you prefer to share something contemplative?
I'll use your posts next month for my inspiration
and share your links within a rhyming study summation.


Non rhyming directions for the poetry challenged:

(1) Create a new post about doors and windows or link to one that was already on your blog. Please note: your post does not need to be poetic or rhyming. All styles of blogs are welcome as long as their post is about doors and windows.

(2) Please include a link back to the Smiley Sociology Study within your post to help spread the word about the link exchange. The more "data" / posts I have to peruse, the better pseudo sociological results I can produce!

(3) copy the link for that post and paste link into Mister Linky below.
Please link directly to the post you want to share, not to your home page.
I will delete your link from the study if I cannot find a post about doors and windows to link to directly.

(4) leave a comment here to let me know you've posted a link

(5) read links left by others and tell them (nicely) what you think