Dear Cat Lady,
You really didn't think that maybe
Did you name each and every one?
(Trying to think of and remember those would be fun.)
I hope that they "do their business" outside,
but bet they do it where they want, with pride.
It's no wonder they stole all your hubbies food.
They were just hungry, not trying to be rude.
Ok, so maybe cats in groups have more attitude,
but that's just too much pussy! (Sorry to be crude,
but you don't have to be a feline fearing, pussy prude,
to feel sorry for the dude the way the story is being skewed.)
Have you been training them to do kitty tricks
like jump over candlesticks and ninja smash bricks?
Maybe you should start with jumping and fetching sticks?
Or just photograph them doing funny air licks?
I hope there's no cat fight over who's your top picks.
If you already endured a husband who was was
worse than 500 cats worth of dirty hair fuzz,
then you don't deserve the stress of feline disunity
and it's barrage of scrapes and hisses that drive some to lunacy.
I hope you've got a plan for your kitty clan.
Let me know how it's going if and when you can.
Enjoy embracing your new single lady style!
Sincerely,
Rachel Hoyt
of Rhyme Me a Smile
