Barrel of Monkeys Driving Test

A little while back on a day trip to the wineries,
I invented a new safe driver type test.
My designated driver had a barrel of monkeys,
just hanging on my car seat... 'cuz they're the best!
So I hung those cute little red monkeys, four in a row.
Said we'd whine if they swung wild or fell down below.
One monkey fell after several hours of watching,
but it was while navigating a bumpy dirt road.
I must say, they don't slow much from the factory notching,
and there was never a risk we'd implode.

Since then I've been thinking on this subject more.
The idea could be used for fun field sobriety exams.
I think policemen would absolutely adore...
childhood games played by drunk dudes and madames.
Jenga and Pin the Tail on the Donkey might be a little tough,
but Twister, Operation, or Charades would be even more rough.
Perhaps for April Fool's day some precinct will try...
by the power of Chief Wiggum, I hope they do.
Of course, for their prank to successfully fly,
they'll need permission to slightly harass me and you.

I would think Pictionary game night at a dive bar,
is likely to draw a decent sized crowd.
Of course those who don't like it would run far,
because Pictionary players can get pretty loud.
Or, you might be able to increase daytime payouts,
with card tower creation or domino pattern layouts.
I think you'd be surprised who would enjoy,
the chance to relive memories of being a child.
Most men like the chance to act like a boy;
the ability to feel like they're really getting wild.

I, for one, will always remember that special day,
when we invented the barrel of monkeys driving test.
No worry or care could get in our way.
We were living in the moment and forgetting the rest.
Ok... so, perhaps the wine influenced the monkeys hanging in a row.
Then again, we were sober when inventing Early Morning Merlot.
I'm just the type who finds great joy in little things;
and have even more fun making fun of myself.
Mischief... oh the joy it brings.
Hard to leave it on the shelf.

© Rachel Hoyt 2010 - 2011

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