Wednesday, September 15, 2010

Teddyphobia Eradication


After hearing the results of a recent survey conducted by Travelodge...
I decided maybe it was time to retrieve my teddy bears from the garage.
Is it possible they'll no longer be seen as just a children's toy?
Will other adults finally admit their teddies still bring them joy?
I'm sure some will write off the facts because they are British,
but I'm hoping some Americans won't be quite that skittish.
Playing each day could be just what we need to endure...
until the economy recovers and we all feel more secure.
If one in four businessmen really do find comfort from them when traveling,
then the firm stereotype about manly men may finally be unraveling.

If you are now wondering about a good first day to play...
I recommend National Bring a Teddy Bear to Work Day.
I think I'll simulate a car pool with stuffed animals,
though I doubt the CHP will tolerate my shenanigans.
I will, however, be sure to avoid any extra ticket,
by ensuring my bears practice safe riding and "click it".
Once at work, they could hang at the empty workstations,
and cover up the recession caused office "evacuations".
It's time we admit we love our teddies more than we say,
and let them bring happiness to an otherwise mundane day.

I am concerned that teddyphobia eradication would have one likely demise:
acceptance of teddy abuse we were once known to despise.
Money laundering through stuffed animals would still be forbidden,
but would beating up Teddy Ruxpin for anger therapy be forgiven?
I'm worried there are lots of guys who've held onto their toys,
to make them do the dangerous tricks they dreamed of as boys.
Perhaps there are women who've saved theirs for the same reason...
they might advocate together for teddy bear hunting season!
Teddies everywhere might never again be safe from harm,
because we finally admitted they have a pseudo-adult charm.

I'm just so torn about how open my teddy love should be...
so conflicted about letting my stuffed animal love roam free...
thinking of the dance offs and tea parties they've missed...
and the years in storage during which they never got kissed...
I decided the best plan would be to take it one step at a time,
so I began by cleaning each to remove the storage grime.
Though stored in closed tubs, black dust somehow got in.
It is apparent I picked the right place to begin.
When I'm done I plan to lay outside and stare into the blue...
while I ponder the question, "What Would Roosevelt Do?"

© Rachel Hoyt 2010 - 2011

No comments:

Post a Comment

Rhyming or not, I would like a lot to hear the thoughts my words brought...