Thursday, June 21, 2012

Thursday Thoughts - Computer Glitches and Ronald Page

image by Salvatore Vuono via

I hear you had quite an exploit
because one ATM functioned quite maladroit.
One might wonder if it was programmed to fail
at discerning who's a buffoon and who's a whale
though it need only check one basic fact:
is this account cash empty or packed?

I never thought I'd live to see a crime
that resembled that "pennies for everyone" line
that Peter Gibbons used in Office Space
to justify the great big smile on his face
caused by a purposeful computer glitch
which succeeded, though with a small hitch.

When you realized you could continue withdrawing
cash despite a negative balance (quite appalling)
did you think that it must be "cash for free day"?
A special, one time gift to gamble away?
That fate had finally sent your reward
so during retirement you wouldn't be bored?

I know we all thought those government bailouts
would eventually help the people's worries and pouts,
but I don't think that the government intended
for lending practices to be quite this amended
or for one guy to get 1.5 million for free
while nothing trickles down to the masses (and me).

And, call me crazy, but I think every human knows
if they can afford to use dollars to blow their nose.
So, who is the Milton in this wacky scenario
helping lessen your time in jail (if you go)?
Did you steal his coveted Swingline
stapler which makes days more sublime?

I can't imagine another good reason why
anyone would defend your silent outcry
for a more lavish retirement fund...
but the prosecution did.  I'm stunned!
Then again, there's no chance for restitution
if you're in jail or a mental institution...

So much for retiring in style!

Good luck!

Rachel Hoyt
of Rhyme Me a Smile

© 2012 Rachel Hoyt.  All rights reserved.

Read the news that inspired the rhyme here.

Technorati Tags: , , , ,


  1. I hadn't heard about this incident, but you sure informed us all in such a creative and humorous way. Great writing!

    1. Thank you, Martha! They started telling the story on my radio on Wednesday and I was a bit bummed. I wrote this before that and wanted to be first to tell. :P

  2. that is a pretty crazy incident...and why he did not invite me over to withdrawl i just dont understand...smiles..ha, you know he thought he hit the lotto...

    1. If he had shared the money, maybe there would be some left! LOL. :)

  3. Again... you totally cracked me up! Thank you! Thank you!

    1. I'm so glad! You're welcome! You're welcome! :)

  4. he should have done a runner!
    maybe somewhere sunnier?


    1. Well, he did a run of gambling. Does that count? :)


Rhyming or not, I would like a lot to hear the thoughts my words brought...