Vibeadonna Syndrome
by Rachel Hoyt
image by chawalitpix via freedigitalphotos.net
Last night, I felt a phantom vibe,
Tingle my leg, tickle my hide.
It buzzed right through me all night long -
Buzz, buzz - a tweet? text? email? WRONG!
All night long, phantom vibes like gongs:
What if Susie tweeted 'bout a party?
What if Lucy's 'liking' ev'ry post by Benji?
What if Hailey Hollywood fumbled again?
What if I miss pictures of cats sexy men?
What if my friends start to think I am boring?
What if I lose part of my following?
What if I need to change my profile picture?
What if words were blabbed that deserve my stricture?
What if this phantom vibe causes a twitch?
What if it also starts to make me itch?
What if the vibes become phantom thoughts?
What if I acted on whatifs and whatnots?
What if I put my cell phone down on the shelf?
What if I try being happy, all by myself?
I believed those last wise whatifs,
And briefly felt their peaceful bliss,
'Til Tammy came to say that Shelly and Shelby,
Were breaking up on Twitter! That I had to see.
© 2012
Rachel Hoyt. All rights reserved
Inspired by Shel Silverstein's poem, "Whatif",
an article on phantom vibrations,
and this article on the neurological benefits of talking about oneself.
Read more rhymes by Rachel at her new column, Clickety Clack -
poetic news about Santa Barbarians talking back.
