Thursday Thoughts - Phantom Vibrations

Vibeadonna Syndrome

by Rachel Hoyt

 

image by chawalitpix via freedigitalphotos.net

 

Last night, I felt a phantom vibe,

Tingle my leg, tickle my hide.

It buzzed right through me all night long -

Buzz, buzz - a tweet? text? email? WRONG!

All night long, phantom vibes like gongs:

What if Susie tweeted 'bout a party?

What if Lucy's 'liking' ev'ry post by Benji?

What if Hailey Hollywood fumbled again?

What if I miss pictures of cats sexy men?

What if my friends start to think I am boring?

What if I lose part of my following?

What if I need to change my profile picture?

What if words were blabbed that deserve my stricture?

What if this phantom vibe causes a twitch?

What if it also starts to make me itch?

What if the vibes become phantom thoughts?

What if I acted on whatifs and whatnots?

What if I put my cell phone down on the shelf?

What if I try being happy, all by myself?

I believed those last wise whatifs,

And briefly felt their peaceful bliss,

'Til Tammy came to say that Shelly and Shelby,

Were breaking up on Twitter! That I had to see.

© 2012 Rachel Hoyt. All rights reserved

 

 

Inspired by Shel Silverstein's poem, "Whatif",

an article on phantom vibrations,

and this article on the neurological benefits of talking about oneself.

 

 

Technorati Tags: Cell, Phone, Vibrate, Rhyme, Poetry

 

 

 

Read more rhymes by Rachel at her new column, Clickety Clack -

poetic news about Santa Barbarians talking back.

Techno Brains

Image by Salvatore Vuono via freedigitalphotos.net

I remember my mom's first Palm Pilot.

We all joked that she'd bought

a better brain; coherent thought.

Now our "brains" are bigger and faster.

The cell phone has become our master.

We rely on it to save us from disaster.

Talking while walking, you can't look before

crossing the street - is danger in store?

A phone app can alert you to that which you ignore.

You also don't need a detective

to determine if your spouse defected.

Find my phone app = location detected.

Never worry about drunk dialing again.

Let the Designated Dialer decide when

your hands are too shaky to call a "friend".

And when teens and technology start driving you nuts,

and you need a phone app's help (and have guts),

get the Annoy a Teen app!  It's fun - no ifs, ands, or buts!

Never again waste time thinking independently!

If there's no app yet, there'll be one eventually.

Techno brains will rule some day... inevitably!

© 2011 - All Rights Reserved - Rachel Hoyt

 

Technorati Tags: Technology, Phone, Brain, Humor, Sarcasm, Poetry

Not-So-Super Supercomputers

Sometimes I think the "kids" these days

forget their phones are little computers.

As soon as it shows its imperfect ways

they want to trash it like techie polluters.

Like Cookie Monster, the next generation

wants what it wants, how it wants, when it wants.

I feel like I'm having an old age revelation

as failure to meet expectations inevitably daunts.

poem © 2011 - all rights reserved - Rachel Hoyt

Technorati Tags: Entertainment, Video, Computers, Humor, Technology, Poetry


I'm sharing this rhyme and video for You Tube Tuesday.
Come join in the fun!  It's a fun way to play.

Josh from "Its Tiger Time" invented You Tube Tuesday so we could each share one video a week which we found to be fun, inspiring or otherwise noteworthy.  If you choose to participate, don't forget to leave your links in my comments section (so I can come visit you) and on Josh's page (so you can be part of the contest).

Cancerous Frivolities

iphone image by Salvatore Vuono via freedigitalphoto.net

Are you as annoyed as me to hear the "breaking news" on cell phones?

Does it feel as if they're taunting from upon their knowledge thrones?

I too was bothered by the seeming lack of new information

and the reality that technology was enduring degradation...

until one day I found the list of knowledge I desired.

The following is a summary of what, henceforth, transpired.

I was eager to learn what other items were equally polluting,

but as I read the list, few of the words were computing.

I decided to google one from each letter group

and avoid those cancer causers like strange looking goop.

Acetaldehyde proved there's be something to dread.

I read that it occurs naturally in coffee, fruit and bread.

That sounds much harder to avoid than use of cell phones.

Plus, I bet its remnants lie within many more bones.

Bracken ferns was the next "word" that attracted my eye.

I doubted it was something that I'd given a try,

but lo and behold it's a fairly ordinary plant!

If I had one in my house I'd be writing a rant.

C is for cell phones which now sound much less scary.

(Thank goodness, 'cuz I'm addicted the one that I carry.)

Learning what Dacarbazine was made me laugh a bit,

but it also makes me want to call someone a twit.

A Chemo drug that could cause the very thing it cures?!?!

Would you prescribe it to any ill friend of yours?

As I reached the E's I knew that my search was futile.

Seeing "engine exhaust - gasoline" on the list just felt brutal.

A world without cell phones, cars, bread, fruit or coffee???

Sorry, but that is not a world I'm dying to see.

I'll try to avoid silly obvious causes like smoking

and wear a mask when around fumes that cause choking.

Basically, it'll have to be more risky than this

to interfere with my desire for maximum bliss.

You can choose a life much more cautious if you want,

but my desire for cell phones, bread, fruit and coffee I will flaunt!

© Rachel Hoyt 2011.  All rights reserved.

Technorati Tags: Cancer, Cell Phone, News, Humor, Poetry