Thursday, April 19, 2012

Thursday Thoughts - Earth Day, Methane and Farts

Image by Simon Howden via

This year for Earth Day I'm committing to a big step.
I've been ruminating 'bout ruminants and the gasses they schlep
through our ozone layer, depleting it's strength,
and possibly shortening the planet (and our) life's length.
I feel I need to make a much bigger effort
to avoid need for animals that don't mean to hurt
but fart and burp too much methane to be good.
Avoid ruminants I can, will and should.

I will buy hardly any yarn or things made of wool,
even though their textures are fuzzy and look cool.
I will continue to avoid buying excessive leather
and their plastic-y counterpart we call pleather.
I will continue not eating deer, giraffe and goats
and try to stop dreaming of petting their soft throats.
For every way I've encouraged ruminant burps and farts
I will change my methods in big ways but keep small parts.

I will greatly cut back on my beef consumption
but keep helping with the milk under the presumption
that most of the biggest beef lovers I know don't,
and even if milk mustaches are cool again, won't.
For the occasional beef splurge, I will seek greatness.
(Fred, this is where you can help.  Pardon my get-to-the-point lateness.)
I've heard that feeding cows garlic can help a lot
and think that would taste much better than what we've now got.

I think we should go beyond garlic and try to breed
Fred's special Black Steak recipe through the food we feed
a specially selected group of epicurean cows
that can help us see the benefits of healthier chow.
Fred, I know your recipe is a secret, but perhaps there is
a magic price for selling or a new branch for the family biz...
I just don't think I can give up eating steak completely
because eating yours annually makes my life taste sweetly.

At the very least, please file this in your "maybe I'll do this someday" file.

Happy Earth Day!

Rachel Hoyt
of Rhyme Me a Smile

© 2012 Rachel Hoyt.  All rights reserved.

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  1. Wonderfully clever and very appropriate for Earth Day!

  2. I can forgo most of that with ease
    Milk does not please
    And the rest doesn't bother me
    Picky eating has its perks at my sea

    1. So nice of you to support the cause!
      Even nicer that there's no need to put your usual diet on pause. :)

  3. Those are some difficult commitments to make but also a group of very noble thoughts. Definitely adding them to my to do list... : )

    1. It will be difficult for me too, but it is something I'm trying to do. :)

  4. Wonderfull & noble thoughts to change....

  5. Wow, I forgot about this one...bad inhabitant!

    1. Hey! No forgetting about me, the cows or Earth Day, ok? :)

  6. i dont that i could ever completely forgo meat honestly, i figure in my consuming them its less gas they can shoot into the ozone you know....smiles...this was a fun and clever read for sure...

    1. I don't know if I'll ever give up beef completely either, but I did reduce my intake greatly and will keep trying to do more. I'm glad you enjoyed the read! :)

  7. What a great resolution and what a great waybto make it, through poetry! This has so much right about. I wish I could join you, and will in spirit, not physically though. Beef is part of my diet to stay, I fear.

    1. Beef is tough to give up. I haven't given it up completely, but am trying to eat a lot more beans and nuts... a lot. I have chicken quite a bit and am trying to replace that with fish and more beans and nuts. My body seems to like the healthiness of it, but my tastebuds do miss the beef... and I cave in... then get up and try again. :)


Rhyming or not, I would like a lot to hear the thoughts my words brought...