Thursday, April 19, 2012
Thursday Thoughts - Earth Day, Methane and Farts
Image by Simon Howden via freedigitalphotos.net
This year for Earth Day I'm committing to a big step.
I've been ruminating 'bout ruminants and the gasses they schlep
through our ozone layer, depleting it's strength,
and possibly shortening the planet (and our) life's length.
I feel I need to make a much bigger effort
to avoid need for animals that don't mean to hurt
but fart and burp too much methane to be good.
Avoid ruminants I can, will and should.
I will buy hardly any yarn or things made of wool,
even though their textures are fuzzy and look cool.
I will continue to avoid buying excessive leather
and their plastic-y counterpart we call pleather.
I will continue not eating deer, giraffe and goats
and try to stop dreaming of petting their soft throats.
For every way I've encouraged ruminant burps and farts
I will change my methods in big ways but keep small parts.
I will greatly cut back on my beef consumption
but keep helping with the milk under the presumption
that most of the biggest beef lovers I know don't,
and even if milk mustaches are cool again, won't.
For the occasional beef splurge, I will seek greatness.
(Fred, this is where you can help. Pardon my get-to-the-point lateness.)
I've heard that feeding cows garlic can help a lot
and think that would taste much better than what we've now got.
I think we should go beyond garlic and try to breed
Fred's special Black Steak recipe through the food we feed
a specially selected group of epicurean cows
that can help us see the benefits of healthier chow.
Fred, I know your recipe is a secret, but perhaps there is
a magic price for selling or a new branch for the family biz...
I just don't think I can give up eating steak completely
because eating yours annually makes my life taste sweetly.
At the very least, please file this in your "maybe I'll do this someday" file.
Happy Earth Day!
of Rhyme Me a Smile
© 2012 Rachel Hoyt. All rights reserved.