Rhyme Me A Smile: January 2012

Monday, January 30, 2012

YTT - Would you bet your son he couldn't do backflips every day?

The Parental Bluff

Some dads don't make bets with their sons -

the silly responsible ones -

but some dads, they do,

and some mothers too.

The child "wins" but they too gain tons.

Josh from "Its Tiger Time" invented You Tube Tuesday so we could each share one video a week which we found to be fun, inspiring or otherwise noteworthy. If you choose to participate, don't forget to leave your links in my comments section (so I can come visit you) and on Josh's page (so you can be part of the contest). I hope you like this week's selection!

I have also shared this post at D'Verse Poets' Pub -
a great place for poets amonst the internet hub.

Technorati Tags: Video, Backflip, Parenting, Humor, Limerick, Poetry

Thursday, January 26, 2012

You Can't Survive on Chicken Nuggets Alone

This rhyme was inspired by a 17 year old girl in the U.K.

who has never eaten a fruit or vegetable to this day.

In fact, she pretty much only eats chicken nuggets,

and has recently realized this diet comes with regrets.

Color Me Nutritious

Image by xedos4 via freedigitalphotos.net

When Sally was little, she didn't eat eggs.

She said they contain invisible ungrown legs.

When Susie was little, she hated hot dogs,

bananas, Popsicles and nut-covered cheese logs.

She claimed that some food shapes can cause throat clogs.

When Steven was a younger, more innocent dude,

he swore that he'd never buy nor eat any green food.

He still refuses to buy salad (though dates think it's rude),

and chocolate covered grasshoppers. "They're green too, dude!"

Since Stewart was a tiny lad he's liked to keep things clean,

and feels it best not to eat foods that are brown, red, or green...

pretty much all shades of colors not clear, white, or cream,

because stains aren't as easy to remove as they seem.

Sometimes, if eating out, he'll indulge the full food color scheme.

When Sarah was little she told her dad to buy lots of stock,

because there was one opinion she planned to stick to like a rock,

"Chicken Nuggets are the only food I plan to eat.

Finding plentiful dipping sauces will be my life's feat.

I'll find the fine flavor combos that can't be beat!"

Then, one day, Sarah collapsed in the Arizona heat.

Little Sally's egg phobia earned her a bit of ridicule.

At age 13, she licked an egg for the "cool kids" at school.

Susie eventually realized that she was even less likely to choke

on hot dogs or cheese logs than on an artichoke.

Steven fell in love with a woman named Kelly,

who ate so much asparagus that her pee was smelly.

Stewart never allowed colored foods in his house

and all his life, his only roommate was a little white mouse.

But Sarah, she's the one who's food habits changed her life,

the one who's failure to love more than one food caused her strife.

Because she'd eaten only chicken nuggets for so long,

she spent the rest of her life making up for eating wrong.

She never tasted the bliss of pizza, bacon or donuts

for fear of becoming completely nutritionally nuts.

Technorati Tags: Chicken Nugget, Eating, Food, Health, Healthy Eating, Nutrition, Wellness, Poem

Sunday, January 22, 2012

Paula Deen Helps Cause AND Cure Diabetes

I didn't laugh too hard when I heard about Paula Deen,

making money on both ends, living the American dream!

A Limerick for Paula Deen

A gal with a very full plate

Knew she would have to endure hate

For making us fat

And then after that

Selling drugs that reverse our sad fate.

This rhyme was written for Mad Kane's Limerick-Off today

and will also be shared at Josh's You Tube Tuesday.

Technorati Tags: Paula Deen, Diabetes, News, Humor, Limerick, Poetry

Wednesday, January 18, 2012

Why You Butter Ponder Politics

Norwegian Moo Gold

Image via morguefile.com

If Julia Child had lived to one hundred, remaining sprightly,

I think she could've earned the first female President title by quietly

spreading fear throughout the world that the Norway Butter Crisis

isn't an isolated incident of government inhibited public bliss.

What if someone snuck a bigger butter tax or tariff in fine print

after secretly stockpiling mountains of moo gold for a stint?

What if others decided to restrict excessive butter exporting?

We'll need a leader who believes that's a betrayal worth thwarting.

In a nation where some sculpt art with butter, like it's clay,

and others fry battered whole sticks to nutritionists' dismay,

and still others have no idea that its in everything they eat,

keeping plentiful supplies of moo gold is no insignificant feat.

We've already got enough smuggling problems at our borders.

We don't need the worry of butter gangs and moo gold hoarders.

So, when you start pondering which Presidential candidate you'll back,

consider their stance on that condiment the Norwegians currently lack.

Technorati Tags: Butter, Norway, Crisis, Humor, Politics, Poetry

This rhyme is in honor of those suffering in Norway from a lack of sufficient butter for day to day and from a vast rise in the price they must pay to clog their arteries the old-fashioned way.

Tuesday, January 17, 2012

A Clarihew for Monsieur Pingouin

Mr. Alfred David

walked normal as a kid

but later developed a waddle

and began loving penguins full-throttle.

Monday, January 16, 2012

The Blog Gifts of Christmas Past

Image by chrisroll via freedigitalphotos.net

I called upon the Ghost of Christmas Past to guide me

through the list of blog gifts I'd written down beside me

because sometimes you need a set of fresh eyes to spot

the message in front of you which currently you're not.

My first gift was a Hatian love potion recipe that made me say "Ewwww"

and a sinister revenge story where the bad man becomes beefy stew.

The Ghost told me some people have a gross way of showing love,

but the question is, does it fit the recipient's needs like a glove?

My second gift was a friend selected, singing sea turtle video -

the famous Crush from Finding Nemo on some unknown show.

The Ghost said that this showed that the friend knew me,

and knew how to make me smile without spending a penny.

The third gift was a story of gifts we've hidden and/or forget...

Wait. Let me get this straight. You have present's unopened yet?

The Ghost said some presents mean more while wrapped pretty.

It's the mere existence of the present that fills some with glee.

The fourth gift was a tale of purchasing presents with a plan,

planning in advance and preempting death, when you can.

The Ghost said that it's good to always think and buy for others...

and he hopes the sentiment didn't die with our grandmothers.

The fifth gift reminded me that I have the daily "gift" of solitude.

Those who say the single gal is lucky aren't trying to be rude.

The snoring sounds from the Ghost told me he was one of them.

I bet even he wishes for a night of rest now and then.

The sixth gift was the idea of giving NO gifts on "Jesus' Birthday" -

Alienating others while pleasing God the old fashioned way.

The Ghost had awoken from his nap and chimed in,

"The line between moral and moron is quite thin."

The seventh gift was the near and dear opposite of number six -

having a wealth of "make strangers happy and spread love" tricks.

The Ghost agreed this most neglected but wonderful gift of cheer

is the one we should try to nurture more and more each year.

The eighth gift was a reminder of the corruption of gifting -

the greed of Black Friday zombie-ism into Thursday is drifting.

The Ghost said not to worry, evil like this will always be around,

and in hell, scenes of consumer desparation abound.

The ninth gift mentioned an interoffice, Secret Santa gift exchange -

a scenario which often turns out memorable, funny or strange.

The Ghost told me these are your chance to throw a curve ball.

The gift that causes a group laugh is the most valuable of all.

The tenth gift was the reminder that people will surprise you,

and when you take their wit for granted it's easy to do.

The Ghost laughed and said, "So, have you figured it all out?

The surprise sociological knowledge is your true present, no doubt."

He vanished through the wall before I could voice my response,

but I think that he listened from afar, despite his nonchalance.

"When gifting you should think with your heart, not your head,

and ponder how the memory will be recalled when you're dead."

Technorati Tags: Gift, Story, Rhyme, Humor, News, Poetry

If you want a link to your blog to appear in a rhyme,
try out the next study... it's a rhyming good time!

Sunday, January 15, 2012

Taco Crime Limerick

A man was trying to hide
The fact he'd recently tried
To use 9-1-1

As his hired gun
To buy tacos, drive-through, with no ride.

I'd like to thank Buzz Feed's list of taco related crimes

for inspiring this limerick and more rhyming good times.

Technorati Tags: Crime, Taco, Funny, Humor, Limerick, Poetry

Tuesday, January 10, 2012

YTT - Dr. Seuss Burning Man

Out in the desert, there is a place

that brings a smile to many a face -

Where alter egos abound,

And Much unique art is found,

Where people live wild and free

And roam dirt streets filled with glee.

When Dr. Seuss wrote of places we'd go,

I definitely think he imagined this show.

Thank you, Boing Boing, for sharing this video!

Thursday, January 5, 2012

Smiley Sociology Study #12 - The No Evil Monkeys

One of my goals for this year is to make my studies

more Sociological however I can.

You can still contribute however you please,

but I will layout a more thorough plan.

I will offer many study ideas specifically,

which I plan to act upon myself.

You can write a post that fits randomly,

or do one of my studies yourself.

This month's theme comes from three monkeys

who neither see, speak nor hear evil doing.

More often than I lose my darn car keys,

it seems examples of this philosophy are brewing.

Do we think it's wise to keep quiet about "things"

to avoid becoming a part of the drama?

Are we waiting to speak 'til the fat lady sings,

or keeping the peace like the Dali Lama?

How often are we heeding the advice of this trio -

ignoring the dark deeds we know must exist?

Now, let's see if we can expand what we know.

Join me in the study! It's futile to resist!!

THREE NON-RHYMING WAYS TO PARTICIPATE:

(1) WRITE A POST about the "No Evil Monkeys" - Come up with your own twist on the theme or answer one of these questions: What do they stand for? What is the origin of the saying, "See no evil, speak no evil, hear no evil."? How often do you see examples of people living this saying?

(2) LIVE STUDY - Count all the instances of people living out that saying which you come into contact with, take notes and share the following information in your post:

How did you encounter this example? Personal, Business, Media or Other Reasons?

If the encounter was a story about the past, when did the instance actually occur? i.e. someone might tell you today that they knew for years someone was cheating on someone and she kept her mouth shut. From when to when was she or he keeping their mouth shut?

What happened? Summarize the example and why you think it applies.

(3) INTERNET STUDY - Choose one type of example (doctors, teachers, CEOs, politician(s), etc.) and find as many examples as you can while searching the Internet. Keep track of how much time you spend searching and collect the following information:

Total # of Searches Run

Keywords Searched For

Total # of Pages You Viewed

Total # of viewed pages that truly apply to your topic.

List the examples you found and describe how they apply.

DUE TO THE NEED TO BETTER PRIORITIZE MY TIME
AND MY DESIRE TO FOCUS ON WRITING RHYME
I'VE DECIDED TO CANCEL MY SMILEY SOCIOLOGY STUDY
UNTIL SOME UNKNOWN TIME WHEN I'M A LESS BUSIER BEE.