Saturday Scribbles - Gambling vs Gaming

Gamebling

by Rachel Hoyt

 

image by Grant Cochrane via freedigitalphotos.net

 

 

The other night, I felt remiss,

Was missing online poker bliss -

Bat'ling beefcakes for cash chips,

Watching chat screens for whining lips,

Forgetting all of life's grimy grits,

While playing for pennies and sharp'ning my wits.

 

Then I stumbled upon a site,

Which instantly brought me delight -

It seems that gaming subscriptions

Have been deemed not to cause addictions,

Because somehow, once again, legally,

I'm bluffing, check raising, and going 'all in' with glee.

 

 

© 2012 Rachel Hoyt. All rights reserved

 

 

 

Technorati Tags: Poker, Gaming, Gambling, Rhyme, Poetry

Thursday Thoughts - Phantom Vibrations

Vibeadonna Syndrome

by Rachel Hoyt

 

image by chawalitpix via freedigitalphotos.net

 

Last night, I felt a phantom vibe,

Tingle my leg, tickle my hide.

It buzzed right through me all night long -

Buzz, buzz - a tweet? text? email? WRONG!

All night long, phantom vibes like gongs:

What if Susie tweeted 'bout a party?

What if Lucy's 'liking' ev'ry post by Benji?

What if Hailey Hollywood fumbled again?

What if I miss pictures of cats sexy men?

What if my friends start to think I am boring?

What if I lose part of my following?

What if I need to change my profile picture?

What if words were blabbed that deserve my stricture?

What if this phantom vibe causes a twitch?

What if it also starts to make me itch?

What if the vibes become phantom thoughts?

What if I acted on whatifs and whatnots?

What if I put my cell phone down on the shelf?

What if I try being happy, all by myself?

I believed those last wise whatifs,

And briefly felt their peaceful bliss,

'Til Tammy came to say that Shelly and Shelby,

Were breaking up on Twitter! That I had to see.

© 2012 Rachel Hoyt. All rights reserved

 

 

Inspired by Shel Silverstein's poem, "Whatif",

an article on phantom vibrations,

and this article on the neurological benefits of talking about oneself.

 

 

Technorati Tags: Cell, Phone, Vibrate, Rhyme, Poetry

 

 

 

Read more rhymes by Rachel at her new column, Clickety Clack -

poetic news about Santa Barbarians talking back.

Wacky Word Wednesday - Nescient

Nescient

(neh shent)

by Rachel Hoyt

 

image by Stuart Miles via freedigitalphotos.net

 

 

One described as nescient,

Is quite UN-omniscient,

He or she is ign'rant,

With knowledge so NOT pregnant,

And not so reminiscent -

Aptly described as nescient.

 

© 2012 Rachel Hoyt. All rights reserved.

 

 

Every week I rhyme and define a new wacky word.

Come on over to indulge your inner nerd.

And, please let me know of any weird words you've heard.

 

 

Technorati Tags: Words, Vocabulary, Poem, Rhyme, Eristic, Poetry

Saturday Scribbles - Obesity Amongst Captive Animals

Reverse Dietology

by Rachel Hoyt

 

 image by Naypong via freedigitalphotos.net

You just can't trust a pet

To ponder its diet.

You turn your back one sec

And they find ways to wreck

That fifteen minute stroll

Y’all took down to the knoll.

 

If they could only learn -

Eat less or burn, burn, burn!

No one said, "Clean your plate."

Or, "Stand still by that gate."

Captivity made them

Act weak like some humans.

You'd think that free shelter

Would not be a melter

Of motivation

And that adaptation

Would involve one's diet,

But you can't trust a pet.

© 2012 Rachel Hoyt. All rights reserved

Inspired by this BBC News article discovered via Boing Boing.

Technorati Tags: Pet, Diet, Captive, Rhyme, Poetry

 

Thursday Thoughts - Converting Sleep to Song

Melodic Dreams

by Rachel Hoyt

 

 

image by fotographic1980's via freedigitalphotos.net

 

Once fleeting dreams

Now will not die

Sleep's a broken melody

That can now fly.

Hold fast to dreams -

Record a song.

Write down your memory

So you can sing along.

Reach for your dreams

Sing loud and clear

Harnessing energy

Within to squash fear.

© 2012 Rachel Hoyt. All rights reserved

 

 

Inspired by Langston Hughes' poem, "Dreams" and this news article on converting sleep to song.

 

 

Technorati Tags: Sleep, Music, Dreams, Rhyme, Poetry

 

 

Read more rhymes by Rachel at her new column, Clickety Clack -

poetic news about Santa Barbarians talking back.

Happy Talk Like a Pirate Day! Got Patch?

The Nictitate Patch, A Bit of Pirate Jestory

by Rachel Hoyt

image by James Barker via freedigitalphotos.net

As dawn crept near one summer day,

In a beach town, surfers around, one scallywag did lay.

He had winked at near ev'ry lass who braved walking his way.

He loved to "Arrr!" and "Yarrr!" in bars, but was misunderstood.

"Those who 'Arrr', 'Yarrr', and nictitate we holy folks find rude."

Said the preacher, "Abandon his ship of fakey flattertude!"

Then Patch the pirate hatched a plan,

To cover his woe, so none would know, still he winked like a man.

Try as he might to hide from the light, his eyelid is a fan.

One day the patch will flip up fast and he'll be made to tell,

But if his nictitate patch could latch, it would likely sell -

No one wants winks to damn them to hell.

© 2012 Rachel Hoyt. All rights reserved

 

 

This poem was inspired by a comment Bryan White left on my Wacky Word poem, "Nictitate".  Happy Talk Like a Pirate Day!  Hope yarrrs is great!

Technorati Tags: Pirate, Talk, Poem, Rhyme, Nictitate, Poem

Wacky Word Wednesday - Eristic

Eristic

(eh RIS tik)

 

by Rachel Hoyt

 

image by anankkml via freedigitalphotos.net

 

 

This is no time to be eristic,

but some are politically sadistic,

and argue both sides of every statistic,

because they love being controversial, eristic.

 

© 2012 Rachel Hoyt. All rights reserved.

Every week I rhyme and define a new wacky word.

Come on over to indulge your inner nerd.

And, please let me know of any weird words you've heard.

Technorati Tags: Words, Vocabulary, Poem, Rhyme, Eristic, Poetry

Friday Fun - Larry Flynt's Bounty for Mitt's Tax Returns

Mr. Larry Flynt, Teller of Turpitude, King of Horny,

 

You finally did something to bring me to my knees.

My jaw dropped open when I saw the cash bounty

being offered for the tax info on Mr. Mitt Romney

(who should have given us this information for free

to back up his supposed integrity).

I didn't know you'd helped unearth so much dirt,

in the past on politicians who did more than flirt,

although it seems you don't always blab or blurt,

the truth to the public which makes me feel hurt.

 

When you engage the public by dangling rewards;

asking janitors, clerks, bellmen, and security guards,

to show you their hands, then muck your cards,

you seem slipperier than banana peels, yet tougher than gourds.

 

I believe you are right that six degrees of separation,

could bring figures and facts on the financial fornication,

that is rampant among the Richie Rich's of the nation,

and could curtail one candidate's clout, hardly in gestation.

 

If loose lips come to you, your lips should be loose too.

Yet why should I have to say that to one as experienced as you?

Why wouldn't you want to spill the beans and screw

Romney's chances? I'm sure this time you'll spew.

 

May your lips find loose friends and show them love, truth bomb style!

 

Sincerely,

 

Rachel Hoyt

of Rhyme Me a Smile

 

 

© 2012 Rachel Hoyt. All rights reserved

 

 

(For more information

on this news that brought me elation,

click here or here without hesitation.)

 

 

Technorati Tags: Mitt Romney, Taxes, Avoid, Rhyme, Poetry

 

 

Read more rhymes by Rachel at her new column, Clickety Clack -

poetic news about Santa Barbarians talking back

Wacky Word Wednesday - Bloviate

Bloviate

by Rachel Hoyt

image by xedos4 via freedigitalphotos.net
 

Politicians sometimes bloviate,

because they think that their ideas are great,

and boast of them when they orate,

and elaborate but don't deviate

as they spout slogans and stories to which we relate...

 

I'll stop here before I bloviate.

 

© 2012 Rachel Hoyt. All rights reserved.

Every week I rhyme and define a new wacky word.

Come on over to indulge your inner nerd.

And, please let me know of any weird words you've heard.

Technorati Tags: Words, Vocabulary, Poem, Rhyme, Bloviate, Poetry

Thursday Thoughts - Oh Canada, Where's the Syrup?

 

image by Paul via freedigitalphotos.net

 

Farewell Maple Syrup, my sweet friend!

On your dulcet joy, I once did depend,

But Canada's stockpile will need to mend,

Because thieves heisted lots of liquid gold -

$30 million worth is what I'm told.

I want to help make sure that kids,

Don't have to fuss or flip their lids,

Because their mom could not afford,

Liquid gold which they knew not to hoard.

Careless Canada should not feel bad.

I was planning to diet. I am not mad.

I won't be having waffles or pancakes,

Nor dripping syrup on my oatmeal or cornflakes.

I will not need sauce for any french toast.

I can skip drizzling gold on top of my pork roast.

I feel for my 'neighbors', high up north. I know,

These mishaps are the way 'things' sometimes show.

I will let you get going - syrup stealers to snare.

Coping with this type of market must be tough to bear.

Perhaps it is now sold as 'homemade'? (It happens.)

For what it's worth, I feel your pain and so do sales of napkins.

Watch out for guys named Rosco and those with Hamburglar style!

Sincerely,

Rachel Hoyt

of Rhyme Me a Smile

 

 

© 2012 Rachel Hoyt. All rights reserved.

Technorati Tags: Mitt Romney, Taxes, Avoid, Rhyme, Poetry

 

 

Read more rhymes by Rachel at her new column, Clickety Clack -

poetic news about Santa Barbarians talking back

Wacky Word Wednesday - Nictitate

Nictitate

by Rachel Hoyt

image by photostock via freedigitalphotos.net

 

 

Guys who nictitate

think themselves to be great,

and often stay out late,

looking for a date,

winking at gals who look great,

hoping if they wait,

one will take the bait,

and fall for the flirt who nictitates.

 

© 2012 Rachel Hoyt. All rights reserved.

 

Every week I rhyme and define a new wacky word.

Come on over to indulge your inner nerd.

And, please let me know of any weird words you've heard.

 

Technorati Tags: Words, Vocabulary, Poem, Rhyme, Nictitate, Poetry