Thursday Thoughts - CATastrauphic Divorce in Israel

Image by Carlos Porto via freedigitalphotos.net

Dear Cat Lady,

You really didn't think that maybe

500 cats was a little bit crazy?

Did you name each and every one?

(Trying to think of and remember those would be fun.)

I hope that they "do their business" outside,

but bet they do it where they want, with pride.

It's no wonder they stole all your hubbies food.

They were just hungry, not trying to be rude.

Ok, so maybe cats in groups have more attitude,

but that's just too much pussy! (Sorry to be crude,

but you don't have to be a feline fearing, pussy prude,

to feel sorry for the dude the way the story is being skewed.)

Have you been training them to do kitty tricks

like jump over candlesticks and ninja smash bricks?

(I know one cat that does stuff like that for kicks.)

Maybe you should start with jumping and fetching sticks?

Or just photograph them doing funny air licks?

I hope there's no cat fight over who's your top picks.

If you already endured a husband who was was

worse than 500 cats worth of dirty hair fuzz,

then you don't deserve the stress of feline disunity

and it's barrage of scrapes and hisses that drive some to lunacy.

I hope you've got a plan for your kitty clan.

Let me know how it's going if and when you can.

Enjoy embracing your new single lady style!

Sincerely,

Rachel Hoyt

of Rhyme Me a Smile

© 2012 Rachel Hoyt. All rights reserved.


Technorati Tags: Divorce, Israel, Rhyme, Humor, Cats, Poetry

Wacky Word Wednesday - Espy

Espy

by Rachel Hoyt

Image by Pixomar via freedigitalphotos.net

The word espy

is often used in poetry

to mean notice or see.

So, if you espy "espy",

what did you see?

You saw poetically

what it means to espy.

© 2012 Rachel Hoyt. All rights reserved.

Every week I rhyme and define a new wacky word.

Come on over to indulge your inner nerd.

And, please let me know of any weird words you've heard.

Technorati Tags: Words, Vocabulary, Poem, Rhyme, Espy, Poetry

Friday Photo Fun - Something in Landscape

Something in Landscape

by Rachel Hoyt

They decorate the landscape around a music hall

named for a man who animated smiles for all.

It's color is calming, loving and lovely.

In 2005 it was California's 'it' tree.

© 2012 Rachel Hoyt. All rights reserved.

Friday Photo Fun is when I share a randomly captured moment,
or perhaps a photo experiment with more purposeful intent,
then pair it with a rhyming riddle to exercise your mind
and teach you more weird facts to which you once were blind.

After the answer is guessed, I will post a second, non-abstract photo,

and just in case you wanted to know,
the first is not a photoshopped version of the second -
they're shot using different techniques that to me beckon.

Wanda wins again with her guess, Pink Trumpet Tree.
Without her plant knowledge we
might never see
the answer to this riddle ditty!

Technorati Tags: Game, Abstract Photo, Rhyme, Humor, Guess, Poetry

Thursday Thoughts - On Mark Zuckerberg and the Forbes Celebrity List

image by Master Isolated Images via freedigitalphotos.net

Dear Facebook Man, Zucky-Zuck, aka Mark,

Your life, lately, sure seems to be filled with spark!

This week, in two big ways, you made your mark:

First your IPO traded at record breaking speed,

then you and Patricia sneakily did the deed,

but somehow you didn't make the Forbes celebrity list

which Facebook "helps judge".  You must be pissed!

But your TV and radio appearances are way too few

and your failure to capitalize on your 'look' won't do.

I can't believe you let someone beat you to designing

the pinstripe suit-hoodie (a look you're defining).

Perhaps you should get to work on a cologne?

'Essence of Zuck' sounds like it'd be cool to own.

Maybe you're already working on another movie

to spread your life story, unbeknownst to me,

but if not perhaps your wife wants a reality show?

What is Patricia's life like?  The people want to know!

Or... if perhaps you both can sing fairly well,

a bit of holiday music would be the thing to sell.

Lastly, if you want to give a little bit back

and help those which Facebook's pushed out of whack,

I would suggest that you and Oprah get together

and put those addicts on a couch of fine leather.

OWN can make it a show so helping them will help you

and maybe then Oprah won't stay stuck at #2.

I hope you'll consider my thoughts for a little while

although, in your shoes, I have not walked a mile.

Sincerely,

Rachel Hoyt

of Rhyme Me a Smile

P.S.  Sorry to hear about that stockholder lawsuit thing.
Hope you didn't spend it all already on one ruby ring...

© 2012 Rachel Hoyt.  All rights reserved.


Technorati Tags: Facebook, Zuckerberg, Rhyme, Humor, News, Poetry

Wacky Word Wednesday - Fossick

Image by Pong via freedigitalphotos.net

I think I would like fossicking -

rummaging, scavenging,

for gold, gems and things.

To pick over abandoned workings

for value that strums our heartstrings -

that's good, old-fashioned fossicking.

© 2012 Rachel Hoyt.  All rights reserved.

Every week I rhyme and define a new wacky word.

Come on over to indulge your inner nerd.

And, please let me know of any weird words you've heard.

Technorati Tags: Words, Vocabulary, Poem, Rhyme, Fossick, Poetry

Sunday Fun Day - Rock Eating Limerick

Rockin' Taste

by Rachel Hoyt

A woman who tried to persuade
her taste buds not to feel betrayed,
said, "Rocks taste earthy 

and crispy crunchy.
They're the best free snack nature made!"

© 2012 Rachel Hoyt.  All rights reserved.

This rhyme was written for Mad-Kane's Limerick-Off,

where the humor will make you giggle and snicker, not scoff,

and inspired by the news linked to above and right here

about a woman who eats whatever rocks lie near.

Technorati Tags: Rocks, Eating, News, Humor, Limerick, Poetry

Friday Photo Fun - Something Eaten

Something Eaten

by Rachel Hoyt

Contains the power to help you stay slim

or kill germs and bacteria on a whim

while taking your taste buds on a trip

to somewhere much more exotic and hip.

© 2012 Rachel Hoyt. All rights reserved.

Friday Photo Fun is when I share a randomly captured moment,
or perhaps a photo experiment with more purposeful intent,
then pair it with a rhyming riddle to exercise your mind
and teach you more weird facts to which you once were blind.

After the answer is guessed, I will post a second, non-abstract photo,

and just in case you wanted to know,
the first is not a photoshopped version of the second -
they're shot using different techniques that to me beckon.



Alejandro guessed the correct answer this week (easily?)
due to his massive love for chilis. 

Thursday Thoughts - On BPAs, Plastic and Packaged Food

Dearest Prince of Plastic,

It would be really fantastic

(though it may sound drastic)

if you could banish fakery,

poverty, slavery and trickery

in your kingdom of plasticity.

I heard about these BPAs

and their evil infectious ways,

but just realized in recent days

that it's in, on or near everything I buy!

Why must BPAs haunt and taunt me?  Why?!

The tupperware I bought isn't safe enough

to heat food in and extra dish work is rough.

And what about all those convenience foods?

Is anything wrapped in plastic safe dudes?

Those BPAs could really alter our moods...

I'm a single gal with little time to cook

who tries to eat healthy but can still, with one look,

count ten or more suspicious items within view

that might have BPAs that could harm you.

How can I know if my fears are true?

Since the FDA won't stand up for us (Who's to gain?),

I thought you could bless your kingdom and wane

the use of low quality plastics that cause us pain.

There must be some other, better use to suit their style.

Perhaps you could just put them on welfare for a while?

Thanks for your help!

Rachel Hoyt

of Rhyme Me a Smile

© 2012 Rachel Hoyt.  All rights reserved.

Technorati Tags: BPA, Plastic, Rhyme, Humor, News, Poetry

Wacky Word Wednesday - Pusillanimous

Pusillanimous

by Rachel Hoyt

image by David Castillo Domanici via freedigitalphotos.net

Pusillanimous rhymes with unanimous

but implies that fear lives within us.

Yes, cowardly is a word that's synonymous

with this one you won't hear on the bus -

it's pretentious cousin, pusillanimous.

© 2012 Rachel Hoyt. All rights reserved.

 Every week I rhyme and define a new wacky word.

Come on over to indulge your inner nerd.

And, please let me know of any weird words you've heard.

Technorati Tags: Words, Vocabulary, Poem, Rhyme, Pusillanimous, Poetry

Friday Photo Fun - Something Grown

Something Grown

by Rachel Hoyt

A field full looks like rainbows -

one of Mother Nature's very best shows.

Their Asiatic origin, I bet no one knows,

because that isn't where the bulk today grows.

© 2012 Rachel Hoyt.  All rights reserved.

Friday Photo Fun is when I share a randomly captured moment,

or perhaps a photo experiment with more purposeful intent,
then pair it with a rhyming riddle to exercise your mind
and teach you more weird facts to which you once were blind.

After the answer is guessed, I will post a second, non-abstract photo,

and just in case you wanted to know,

the first is not a photoshopped version of the second -

they're shot using different techniques that to me beckon

Andy (the romantic poet) found the answer rolled off his lips.
This week's abstractified object is tulips!

 

Technorati Tags: Game, Abstract Photo, Rhyme, Humor, Guess, Poetry

Thursday Thoughts - Selling Handmade Crafts Online

Dear Conscientious Consumers,

You may have heard the rumors

that some people are faking handmade.

It could be true that they paid

someone else to make a whole bunch,

but if they could hardly pay for lunch

with the income from that "handmade" necklace,

then their hourly rate is totally reckless!

Also, if you've seen someone wear

something that seems to closely compare,

it could be because that piece isn't so unique

and didn't break quickly "because it's antique".

The fact is that it's near impossible to survive

selling crafts as the economy takes a nose dive

and stores lower their prices to try to stay alive

and consumers seek prices that allow consuming to thrive.

No artisan who aspires to create crafts with vim

and patiently produces the quality she dreams of within,

should charge a cheap wage for an ounce of their time

or rush through creating and think things will be fine.

Their orders might take a little longer to ship out

because there's no one to help or boss about

and the selection of products might not be as vast

because capital becomes "income" as sale free times last.

We work hard and should be easy to spot.

Our stuff usually makes you say, "Dang that costs a lot."

But remember, we're making something with true style.

Thanks for buying handmade (even once in a while)!

Sincerely,

Rachel Hoyt

of Rhyme Me a Smile

© 2012 Rachel Hoyt.  All rights reserved.

Wacky Word Wednesday - Gormless

Gormless

by Rachel Hoyt

image by digitalart via freedigitalphotos.net

Those who are gormless

are completely harmless

though may appear thoughtless

which may seem a bit reckless

but really they can't help all this

because they're just a bit brainless.

Gosh I'm glad I'm not gormless.

© 2012 Rachel Hoyt.  All rights reserved.

 

Every week I rhyme and define a new wacky word.

Come on over to indulge your inner nerd.

And, please let me know of any weird words you've heard.

Technorati Tags: Words, Vocabulary, Poem, Rhyme, Gormless, Poetry

Friday Photo Fun - Something Antique

Something Antique

by Rachel Hoyt

Invented around the same time as instant coffee,

cellophane and Life Savers candy.

They're helpful for saving time and energy.

I use my modern one quite frequently.

So, what's in this snap I took at an antique store?

Can you guess which thing I couldn't ignore?

© 2012 Rachel Hoyt.  All rights reserved.

Friday Photo Fun is when I share a randomly captured moment,

or perhaps a photo experiment with more purposeful intent,
then pair it with a rhyming riddle to exercise your mind
and teach you more weird facts to which you once were blind.

After the answer is guessed, I will post a second, non-abstract photo,

and just in case you wanted to know,

the first is not a photoshopped version of the second -

they're shot using different techniques that to me beckon.

Bryan guessed the right answer was toaster.
He wins the right to be a boaster.

Technorati Tags: Game, Abstract Photo, Rhyme, Humor, Guess, Poetry

Thursday Thoughts - the FDA, GRAS and Meat Glue

image by piyato via freedigitalphotos.net

Fine folks of the FDA,

I've got a few things I need to say

about a fact I learned the other day.

You approved the use of meat glue?

Well, to be precise, they notified you

and you accepted their research as true

and enough to see what it would do

if you allowed Transglutaminase

to work it's magical ways

on processed meats and seafood

without really telling us.  (How rude.)

I'm sure it would have been rough to write

a press release that sounded just right...

"We generally accept it as safe for you to eat

pieces of glued together scrap-mignon meat."

... but hearing the truth would've been neat.

I've worked in restaurants and catering

doing the "serve people for tips" thing,

but have never, ever heard anything

about this way to make meat scraps cling.

Your food safety tactics there seem quite crazy.

Or perhaps it's that you're understaffed and/or lazy?

I feel like the FDA's purpose is hazy.

Aren't we the ones who you should protect?

This notification process you use seems derelict,

like the ones thoroughly checked are random picked

or chosen due to a food scare or outbreak,

saying that's a risk they can take

with this weird thing that they make.

I suppose I should be thanking you for helping wreck beef.

For me, craving ruminants less will be a relief.

The issue now is avoiding strange GRAS listed food,

the thought of which brings out my super sour mood.

I've heard of, "The more you spend, the more you save!"

It's the motto that makes luxury bargain shoppers cave.

I hope yours isn't, "This looks fun to try out for a while."

Is that really the mark of your signature style?

Please ponder what the heck you've allowed in our food piles.

Thank you,

Rachel Hoyt

of Rhyme Me a Smile

Wacky Word Wednesday - Ennui

Ennui

by Rachel Hoyt

image by Stuart Miles via freedigitalphotos.net

I strive to be

the antidote to ennui -

to help your brain stay cheery

so you won't sit listlessly,

wasting away the day

bored in every way.

Though ennui sounds cool to say,

only Seinfeld could make nothingness pay.

© 2012 Rachel Hoyt.  All rights reserved.

Every week I rhyme and define a new wacky word.

Come on over to indulge your inner nerd.

And, please let me know of any weird words you've heard.

 

Technorati Tags: Words, Vocabulary, Poem, Rhyme, Ennui, Poetry